Birthplace center Brandon Eckles makes stunning decision

eckles

By Gage Nutter

Fans of the Springfield men’s basketball team have been looking forward to next year’s season for over a month now. With Division III Rookie of the Year Jake Ross on the roster and no one being lost to graduation, the prospects for next season seemed to be sky high. Maybe even a national championship could be within reach.

That dream took a major blow on Wednesday. To coincide with his 21st birthday, Pride forward Brandon Eckles made a stunning announcement. Instead of celebrating his 21st birthday entering a bar with his legal I.D., Eckles announced his decision to enter the NBA draft. The standout forward announced his decision via press conference in the Dodge rooms upstairs in the campus union.

Eckles stated that the decision was an easy one to make.

“Yeah the guys here at Springfield have been great and all, but I’m trying to move out of my cramped room in Alumni and into a mansion y’know?.”

Eckles expressed that there is no competition when it comes to who the best forward in the country is. It’s him.

“My left shoe is better than Harry Giles,” said Eckles in regards to the standout from Duke University. “The dude averaged 3.9 points per-game this year, and he thinks he’s going in the first round? I dropped 18 points on Bridgewater State this year. What has he done?”

At this point in the press conference, one reporter from the back row told Eckles that Giles is considerably more talented than him. Eckles had to be restrained by men’s basketball head coach Charlie Brock and athletic director Craig Poisson.

“He only started six games!,” Eckles bellowed as he proceeded to knock over his mic stand and podium.

One NBA scout said that Eckles has the potential to be explosive on the next level.

“Once we saw him flex after converting that layup after the foul against Amherst, we knew he could be a steal at the next level,” they said. “Did you see his form on his bicep flex? He has the potential to be the next Draymond Green.”

Brock elected to not answer any questions about his standout forward. He sternly stared at any reporters who asked him questions and aggressively grunted towards their direction.

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